Sunday, April 19, 2009

I just had the most disturbing dream, ever.

I was attending a school concert (considering that I hate concerts generally, this in itself is already a nightmare).

I overheard a woman behind me saying that her tummy really hurt, to her friend.

Being the kind soul I was (in dreams only), I dug my bag for my Axe oil (which I don't own in real life) to pass it to her.

I turned and asked the friend of Miss Painful Tummy, "Is your friend's tummy hurting?" before extending my Axe oil to her.

She (friend of Miss Painful Tummy) took it and dropped it into her bag before my very eyes. "I have been looking for this! Just what I need.."

Shocked, I tried to explain to her that the oil was for her friend, not her, but to no avail. She was simply shamelessly 'kop'ing the oil for her own usage, when her friend was doubling over in pain!

I was so pissed, I argued with her for the longest time and even shouted at her loudly while the concert was still going on. As in dreams, no one came to stop me, which I was wondering why then (not realising it was a dream).

I even threatened to call the police and was so furious I stormed out to complain to somebody.

At the corridor, I found a student council member whom I related the incident to, She went back with me to the concert hall, and horror of horrors, her seat was vacant. The shameless woman had absconded, Axe oil and all.

The kind student council led me to the only route she knew to leave the hall, and indeed, at the staircase landing, we found Mrs. Shameless (too old to be called a Miss).

I grabbed her by her arms and asked an Ah Beng (who was loitering around staircase landings- where they're usually found anyway) to search her bag.

He used a razor and slit her bag open, Ah Beng-style (couldn't he tell that using the clutch was easier?!)

The Axe Oil was nowhere to be found.

The audacity of it all! I was hopping mad by now.

The student council informed me that she had already called for the police.

All this while, I was holding both the hands of Mrs. Shameless, but somehow I kept feeling someone touching my waist from her position. Being too engrossed and angry at the mystery of Missing Axe Oil, I did not take much notice then.

Until it suddenly hit me that humans should only have 2 arms.

Something was clearly amiss. I let go of my grip on Mrs. Shameless, and shouted to the rest that she had 3 arms.

No one seemed to care. Both the Ah Beng and Nice Student Councilor were lifelessly limp, as though Mrs Shameless was a demon who had sucked the life out of them.

I panicked and ran out, where I saw 2 tall, well-built black policemen (as in Hollywood movies police) coming towards me. I ran towards them and led them to the scene.

Until I realised that Shameless Demon was at a phone booth nearby, dialling away while Ah Beng and Nice-now-lifeless Student Councilor was queuing in a line behind her. She had hynotised them! (In dreams, you Just Know. Stop asking me how I knew!)

I warned the police that she had probably hynotised the rest, and ran off. It was just not worth it for a $1.70 Axe Oil.

And you know why I had this terrifying and absolutely ridiculous dream?! It's all because yesterday at the foodcourt, this evil woman snatched the seat I had been waiting for for the longest time!

There was this Filipino couple who had finished their food and was flirting happily with each other. I felt kinda bad waiting for their seat but they were the only ones who had finished and were still hogging the scarce seats.

When they noticed me, they kindly offered their seats to me and even smiled at me.

As they were smiling, this woman came up and plonked her bag onto the seat, even before they had stood up!

I was fuming mad. I had made this happy in-the-mood-for-flirting duo cut short their flirting time, and this other woman just comes and snatches away my seat right before their very flirting?!

Just as I was going to give her a piece of my mind, her young child and husband came over. Damn it!! I couldn't even scold her without feeling bad cause she had a family! (which means it's harder for her to find an empty table, while I could simply share one with others, since there were only two of us).

I stood there (45 centimetres from her) fuming mad for minutes but was unable to release my anger, while she acted like nothing happened.

I figured that all this anger wasn't good for me and walked away to share seats with others.

Apparently, the unreleased anger inside me manifested itself into an absolute nightmare (literally)- that woke me up from my sleep feeling terrified.

In case you were wondering, no, Shameless Demon did not look like 'kop'-seat Woman, but you see the similarities, don't you? One 'kop'ed my seat, another 'kop'ed my Axe Oil.

The moral of the story is this: Never get mad at seat-'kop'ers, and never buy Axe Oil.


WiRuS said...

lol.. interesting dream.. nv see u blog so many words b4..

PingErRain said...

Came across your blog somehow during my google search for some hello kitty stuff.
I should say, your dream is a result of the chain of emotion that u had build up in the day. That's ok.. At least it's just a dream.
I guess you also have notice that older SG locals dun have the graciousness or even simple courtesy one lor... My friend who is 8mth pregnant had to stand from cityhall to sembawang, and no seats was given up to her.

yin said...

ting. this is DAMN FREAKING FUNNY. ok i cant stop laughing now. HAHAHAHAHA.

Anonymous said...

heyy birdie.. i also had a horrendous dream last nite.. it's abt hw this grp mate o mine nv do her part n caused us to be late.. and i'm quite shocked cos it parallels stg tt happened in reality tt i didn't get crossed at. So maybe i was pissed off but i didn't know. So weird.

nxt time scream at shameless seat kopers.